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Abolishing Chronological Age: A Modest Proposal


I propose that we abolish chronological age. What is it good for, anyway? It’s just a marker on a time line that signals our eventual dissolution. At each passing birthday, friends force smiles, make jokes about “fine wine” and “wisdom,” and then move on to other topics. Age is a blemish on the body politic, and on individual bodies. Often, we disguise our age as a secret shameful reality.


For many years I pretended to be ten years younger on a dating site. Unfortunately, I dated an actuary who understood math better than I did. I figured I better 'fess up when he was astounded that I was twelve when I went to college. Advanced chronological age exempts you from the spontaneity, whimsy and silliness of life. People shake their heads, “Aren’t you a little too old for that?” Skirts get longer, heels get shorter, and your favorite red lipstick makes you look like a hooker. You are expected to be responsible as an “older” adult. What is the fun in that?


As a result, aging is dreaded. You are expected to follow with understated behaviors, “age-appropriate” clothing, and a submission to the inevitable. But we needn’t submit. Nothing is inevitable, even age. What I’m talking about here is Skin Care.


Now, you’ve read tons of beauty blogs that go into the science, miracle cures, and complicated or expensive rituals of looking younger. I’m not talking about that. I’m very modestly going to suggest Basic and Consistent Skin Care. Treat your skin as if it were the largest organ of your body, because it is. Without it, we’d evaporate.


Don’t take your skin for granted. Every morning and evening, take 20 minutes to:


1. Cleanse. Use a good cleanser that moisturizes — rather than strips — your skin. Some of the best cleansers are Nahla, 302, SkinScript, Blissoma, Glo, Hylunia, and others you can purchase at a spa.


2) Tone. Use a toner to remove excess dirt or oil, balance your skin’s chemistry (pH), and make pores smaller. A good toner will prepare your skin for the moisturizer. Again, use a good toner. Skip anything with lots of alcohol. Spritz your face liberally.


3). Moisturize. Use a moisturizer that absorbs into your skin, rather than sitting on the top looking greasy. Two of my favorites are 302 Recovery Plus Intensive and Glo Hydra Radiance. Massage the moisturizer into your skin, let it drink it up. Your face will be smooth, supple and glowy!


Will this abolish chronological age? Yes and no. No, you will still see birthdays pass by. But yes, your skin will tell a different story than your birthdays. Your skin will have minimal lines, a smooth texture, a healthy glow and an even appearance. Be consistent morning and evening: cleanse, tone, and moisturize — you might even fool an actuary!

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